Facing Violence

Key Takeaways

1. Violence dynamics: Understand the two types of violence and their subtypes

Humans are nearly unique in the animal world. We are social creatures and so we have subconscious rules for social violence. We are also hunters and we know very well how to efficiently kill prey.

Social violence includes the Monkey Dance (dominance rituals), Group Monkey Dance (pack behavior), Educational Beat-Down (enforcing social norms), and Status-Seeking Show (establishing reputation). These follow predictable patterns and usually have built-in limits.

Asocial violence is predatory, with two main types:

• Resource Predators: Want something from you (money, car, etc.)
• Process Predators: The act of violence itself is the goal (rapists, serial killers)

Understanding these dynamics helps you:

• Recognize potential threats
• Choose appropriate responses
• Avoid escalating social violence unnecessarily
• Prepare for the ruthlessness of predatory attacks

2. Legal and ethical considerations: Know the law and your personal limits

You must be able to explain, to a jury, what you did, why you did it, and why other choices would have been worse.

Legal framework: Self-defense is an affirmative defense, meaning you acknowledge committing the act but claim justification. Key elements:

• Reasonable belief of danger
• Imminent threat
• Proportional response
• Duty to retreat (in some jurisdictions)

Ethical considerations:

• Personal capacity for violence
• Moral limits (e.g., willingness to use lethal force)
• Potential psychological impact of your actions

Prepare by:

• Studying local self-defense laws
• Examining your own ethical boundaries
• Practicing articulation of decision-making process
• Considering potential civil liability

3. Avoidance: The best self-defense is not being there

It is better to avoid than to run, better to run than to de-escalate, better to de-escalate than to fight, better to fight than to die.

Strategies for avoidance:

1. Absence: Don't go to high-risk places
2. Escape and Evasion (E&E): Leave dangerous situations quickly
3. De-escalation: Defuse potential conflicts verbally

Key skills:

• Situational awareness
• Reading terrain and potential ambush points
• Recognizing pre-attack indicators
• Verbal de-escalation techniques

Practice these skills daily:

• Scan your environment regularly
• Plan escape routes in familiar places
• Learn to read body language and social cues
• Role-play de-escalation scenarios

4. Counter-ambush: Train reflexive responses for sudden attacks

If you have to think, the Threat's second strike or the third will land. Every strike that gets in, every stab, decreases your physical ability to do anything about the next. Time is damage. Damaged is defenseless.

Operant Conditioning (OC) is key to developing reflexive responses:

• Pair specific stimuli with pre-planned actions
• Train extensively to bypass conscious decision-making

Core counter-ambush responses:

1. Attack from the front
2. Strike or pull from behind
3. Being overborne from behind
4. Upward vector (often knife attacks)
5. Pre-emptive action when possible

Qualities of effective counter-ambush techniques:

• Simple and adaptable
• Improve your position while worsening the attacker's
• Provide protection and cause damage simultaneously
• Allow for follow-up actions

5. Breaking the freeze: Recognize and overcome paralysis in dangerous situations

Freezing is the state of not moving when you are in danger. Sometimes it is involuntary as your adrenaline kicks in and you go into hard-wired freeze mode. Sometimes it is a strategy: you choose not-moving because it is your best option.

Types of freezes:

• Tactical (choosing not to move)
• Physiological (body switching to survival mode)
• Non-cognitive mental (working from unfamiliar "blueprints")
• Cognitive (information overload, novelty, analysis paralysis)
• Social cognitive (applying civilized rules to uncivilized situations)

Breaking the freeze:

1. Recognize you're frozen
2. Make yourself do something, anything
3. Repeat step 2

Develop the habit of doing unpleasant things quickly and without hesitation in daily life to build "anti-freeze" reflexes.

6. The fight: Reality differs from training - adapt and survive

You have to deal with the Threat that is in front of you and adapt to what you see.

Key differences from training:

• Attacks are faster, harder, and closer than expected
• Element of surprise is significant
• Threats may not react as expected to pain or techniques
• Environment is unpredictable and can be used as a weapon

Strategies for survival:

• Fight the mind, not just the body
• Maximize chaos when losing, minimize it when winning
• Exploit "gifts" - opportunities presented by the attacker's actions
• Be prepared to improvise and abandon ineffective techniques

Remember:

• Pain and damage are the natural environment of battle
• Your goal is to escape or neutralize the threat, not "win" a contest
• Communicate with witnesses if possible to establish legal justification

7. Aftermath: Prepare for medical, legal, and psychological consequences

Win, lose, or draw, if you have to defend yourself and you don't die, you will have to deal with what comes afterward.

Medical considerations:

• Immediate first aid and injury assessment
• Potential for blood-borne pathogens
• Long-term physical consequences

Legal aftermath:

• Criminal investigation and potential charges
• Civil lawsuits (even if criminally cleared)
• Importance of lawyer specializing in self-defense cases

Psychological impact:

• Potential for PTSD or other trauma responses
• Changes in worldview and relationships
• Importance of professional counseling

Key actions:

• Seek immediate medical attention if needed
• Contact a lawyer before giving detailed statements
• Document everything for potential legal proceedings
• Engage in healthy coping mechanisms (avoid self-medication)
• Conduct an After-Action Debriefing to learn from the experience

Remember: It's okay to be okay. Adapting and changing after a violent encounter is natural and doesn't make you "broken."

Last updated: April 17, 2025

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