Setting the Table

The Transforming Power of Hospitality in Business

by Danny Meyer • 2006 • 336 pages

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Food Leadership Biography

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Key Takeaways

1. Build a culture of enlightened hospitality to create exceptional experiences

Hospitality is present when something happens for you. It is absent when something happens to you. Those two simple prepositions – for and to – express it all.

Hospitality is a dialogue. It's about creating a genuine connection with guests and making them feel that you're on their side. This goes beyond providing good service; it's about anticipating needs, showing empathy, and creating memorable experiences. To achieve this:

Focus on making guests feel seen, heard, and valued
Train staff to be agents of hospitality, not gatekeepers
Encourage staff to look for opportunities to go above and beyond

Create a welcoming environment. Pay attention to details that contribute to guests' comfort and enjoyment, such as:

Thoughtful seating arrangements
Appropriate noise levels and music
Warm greetings and genuine farewells

By consistently delivering exceptional hospitality, you create loyal customers who become advocates for your business.

2. Prioritize stakeholders: employees, guests, community, suppliers, then investors

The interests of our own employees must be placed directly ahead of those of our guests because the only way we can consistently earn raves, win repeat business, and develop bonds of loyalty with our guests is first to ensure that our own team members feel jazzed about coming to work.

Put employees first. Happy, motivated employees are the key to delivering great experiences to guests. Prioritize:

Competitive wages and benefits
Opportunities for growth and development
A positive, supportive work environment

Build strong relationships with all stakeholders. While employees come first, it's crucial to nurture relationships with:

Guests: Focus on creating memorable experiences and building loyalty
Community: Engage in meaningful outreach and support local causes
Suppliers: Develop mutually beneficial partnerships based on shared values
Investors: Deliver sustainable returns by taking care of other stakeholders first

This prioritization creates a virtuous cycle where success with one group of stakeholders reinforces success with the others, ultimately leading to long-term profitability and growth.

3. Hire for emotional skills (51%) over technical skills (49%)

We aim to hire people who possess an emotional skill that chef Michael Romano calls the excellence reflex.

Seek out "51 percenters." These are individuals who possess strong emotional skills that align with your company's values and culture. Key emotional skills to look for:

Optimistic warmth
Intelligence (curiosity and willingness to learn)
Work ethic
Empathy
Self-awareness and integrity

Develop a rigorous hiring process. To identify and attract 51 percenters:

Use behavioral interview questions
Implement a "trailing" system for candidates to experience the work environment
Involve current team members in the hiring decision

While technical skills can be taught, emotional skills are more difficult to develop. By prioritizing emotional skills in hiring, you create a team that naturally delivers exceptional hospitality and drives your business forward.

4. Create a virtuous cycle by investing in your community

I am convinced that doing things that make sense for the community leads to doing well as a business.

Engage in meaningful community outreach. Look for opportunities to:

Support local causes and organizations
Participate in community events
Take a leadership role in improving your neighborhood

Encourage employee involvement. Make community engagement a part of your company culture by:

Allowing paid time off for volunteering
Matching employee donations to charitable causes
Recognizing and rewarding community involvement

Align community efforts with your business. Find ways to create win-win situations where your community involvement also benefits your business. Examples:

Sponsoring events that align with your brand values
Partnering with local suppliers and organizations
Creating programs that showcase your expertise while addressing community needs

By investing in your community, you build goodwill, attract like-minded customers and employees, and create a positive reputation that contributes to long-term success.

5. Turn mistakes into opportunities for growth and customer loyalty

The road to success is paved with mistakes well handled.

Embrace mistakes as learning opportunities. Instead of fearing mistakes, view them as chances to:

Improve your processes and systems
Demonstrate your commitment to excellence
Build stronger relationships with customers

Develop a systematic approach to handling mistakes. Follow these steps:

Acknowledge the mistake quickly and sincerely
Take immediate action to rectify the situation
Offer appropriate compensation or a gesture of goodwill
Follow up to ensure the customer is satisfied
Analyze the root cause and implement preventive measures

Write a great last chapter. Go above and beyond in your response to mistakes to turn a negative experience into a positive one. This often leads to increased customer loyalty and positive word-of-mouth.

By handling mistakes well, you not only resolve immediate issues but also build a reputation for integrity and customer care that sets you apart from competitors.

6. Apply constant, gentle pressure to maintain standards and drive improvement

Constant, gentle pressure is my preferred technique for leadership, guidance, and coaching.

Set clear expectations. Clearly communicate your standards and non-negotiable values to all team members. This provides a framework for decision-making and performance.

Consistently reinforce standards. Regularly:

Observe and provide feedback on performance
Recognize and reward excellence
Address issues promptly and constructively

Balance firmness with empathy. When applying pressure:

Be consistent in your approach
Maintain a supportive, coaching mindset
Focus on improvement rather than punishment

By applying constant, gentle pressure, you create an environment where excellence becomes the norm and team members are motivated to continuously improve their performance.

7. Make strategic decisions based on context, timing, and core values

Context is everything. What has guided me most as an entrepreneur is the confluence of passion and opportunity (and sometimes serendipity) that leads to the right context for the right idea at the right time in the right place and for the right value.

Evaluate opportunities holistically. When considering new ventures or partnerships, assess:

Context: Does it align with your brand and values?
Timing: Is your organization ready for this opportunity?
Core values: Will this decision reinforce or compromise your principles?

Be willing to say no. Sometimes the best decisions are the opportunities you decline. Consider:

Would you do this deal if it were free?
Does it excite and energize you?
Can you be a category leader in this venture?

Stay true to your vision. Don't compromise your long-term goals for short-term gains. Make decisions that:

Enhance your overall strategic objectives
Allow you to create something groundbreaking and fresh
Benefit your existing businesses

By carefully evaluating opportunities based on context, timing, and core values, you make decisions that lead to sustainable growth and success.

8. Cultivate a diverse team that complements your strengths and weaknesses

I'm not impressed by a candidate's technical prowess if the meaningful emotional skills aren't already in place.

Build a well-rounded leadership team. Surround yourself with individuals who:

Bring diverse perspectives and expertise
Challenge your thinking constructively
Share your core values and vision

Encourage open dialogue and debate. Create a culture where:

Different viewpoints are welcomed and respected
Decisions are made through consensus-building
Everyone feels empowered to contribute ideas

Recognize and address your own limitations. Be self-aware about:

Your strengths and weaknesses
Areas where you need support or development
Blind spots that could impact decision-making

By cultivating a diverse, complementary team, you create a more resilient organization capable of navigating complex challenges and seizing opportunities.

9. Use hospitality to differentiate your business in any industry

In business, like life, you get what you give. We try to apply a humanitarian viewpoint to every business challenge, to find creative, gracious solutions and reassure our guests that we are solidly on their side.

Apply hospitality principles broadly. Hospitality isn't limited to restaurants; it can be a differentiator in any business:

Focus on creating positive emotional connections with customers
Train all employees to embody a hospitality mindset
Look for opportunities to exceed expectations and create memorable experiences

Customize your approach. Adapt hospitality principles to fit your specific industry and customer base:

Identify key touchpoints where hospitality can make a difference
Develop industry-specific ways to demonstrate that you're on the customer's side
Create systems and processes that support a culture of hospitality

Measure and reward hospitality. Make hospitality a key performance indicator:

Gather feedback on customer experiences
Recognize and celebrate examples of exceptional hospitality
Incorporate hospitality metrics into performance evaluations and incentive programs

By making hospitality a core part of your business strategy, you create a unique competitive advantage that's difficult for others to replicate.

10. Balance growth with maintaining quality and organizational culture

Often, when businesses fail in our industry it's because of too much expansion; quality suffered and the organization couldn't handle it.

Grow strategically and sustainably. When considering expansion:

Ensure you have the necessary talent and resources in place
Maintain focus on your core business while pursuing new opportunities
Be willing to say no to deals that could compromise quality or culture

Preserve your organizational DNA. As you grow:

Clearly articulate and reinforce your core values and culture
Develop strong systems for training and onboarding new employees
Promote from within to maintain continuity and institutional knowledge

Monitor quality closely. Implement systems to:

Regularly assess performance across all locations or divisions
Gather and act on customer feedback
Address issues quickly before they become systemic problems

By balancing growth with a commitment to quality and culture, you create a foundation for long-term success and avoid the pitfalls of overexpansion.

Last updated: January 23, 2025

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FAQ

What's Setting the Table about?

Focus on Hospitality: Setting the Table by Danny Meyer explores the transformative power of hospitality in business, particularly in the restaurant industry. Meyer shares his philosophy that prioritizing genuine hospitality leads to success and loyalty among customers and employees alike.
Enlightened Hospitality Concept: Meyer introduces "enlightened hospitality," which prioritizes the well-being of employees first, followed by guests, community, suppliers, and investors. This approach flips traditional business priorities on their head.
Personal Stories and Lessons: The narrative is filled with anecdotes from Meyer's life and career, illustrating the lessons he learned about business, leadership, and the importance of human connection.

Why should I read Setting the Table?

Invaluable Insights: Readers gain insights into the restaurant business and the importance of creating a welcoming environment. Meyer's experiences provide practical advice that can be applied to various industries.
Inspiration for Entrepreneurs: The book serves as a motivational guide for aspiring entrepreneurs, showcasing how passion and a commitment to hospitality can lead to success. It encourages readers to pursue their dreams while maintaining integrity and care for others.
Understanding Human Connection: It emphasizes the significance of human relationships in business, making it relevant for anyone looking to improve their interpersonal skills and customer service.

What are the key takeaways of Setting the Table?

Prioritize Hospitality: The book stresses that hospitality should be at the core of any business strategy. Meyer believes that how you make people feel is more important than the product itself.
Embrace Mistakes: Meyer discusses the importance of handling mistakes well, stating, "The road to success is paved with mistakes well handled." This perspective encourages resilience and learning from failures.
Build a Strong Team: The success of a restaurant relies heavily on its staff. Meyer highlights the importance of hiring individuals with emotional intelligence and a strong work ethic, coining the term "51 percenters" to describe them.

What is "enlightened hospitality" in Setting the Table?

Definition of Enlightened Hospitality: Meyer defines "enlightened hospitality" as a prioritization of people, starting with employees, then guests, and extending to the community and investors. This approach fosters a supportive and caring work environment.
Impact on Business Decisions: This philosophy influences every business decision Meyer makes, ensuring that the well-being of his team is always considered. It creates a culture of loyalty and commitment among employees.
Long-term Success: By focusing on hospitality and the needs of people, businesses can achieve sustainable success. Meyer argues that this approach leads to better customer experiences and repeat business.

How does Danny Meyer define hospitality in Setting the Table?

Hospitality vs. Service: Meyer distinguishes between hospitality and service, stating that service is the technical delivery of a product, while hospitality is how that delivery makes the recipient feel. This distinction is crucial for understanding his approach.
Emotional Connection: He believes that hospitality is about creating a dialogue with guests, making them feel valued and understood. This emotional connection is what sets successful businesses apart.
Team Sport: Meyer describes hospitality as a team sport, where every member of the staff plays a role in creating a welcoming environment. This collective effort is essential for delivering exceptional experiences.

What challenges did Meyer face while opening his restaurants?

High Expectations: Meyer faced immense pressure to meet the expectations of critics and guests, especially after the success of Union Square Cafe. This pressure sometimes led to stress and self-doubt.
Operational Difficulties: He encountered operational challenges, such as managing a busy kitchen and ensuring timely service. Mistakes in these areas often resulted in unhappy guests and negative feedback.
Personal Struggles: Meyer also dealt with personal challenges, including the loss of family members and the emotional toll of running a business. These experiences shaped his understanding of hospitality and the importance of human connection.

What is the significance of the "51 percent solution" in Setting the Table?

Emotional Skills Priority: The "51 percent solution" refers to the idea that emotional skills are more important than technical skills in hiring and managing staff. Meyer believes that people with strong emotional intelligence create better experiences for guests.
Hiring Philosophy: This philosophy guides Meyer's hiring practices, emphasizing the need for staff who are kind, empathetic, and eager to learn. He seeks individuals who can connect with guests on a personal level.
Team Dynamics: By prioritizing emotional skills, Meyer fosters a positive work environment where employees feel valued and motivated. This, in turn, enhances the overall guest experience.

How does Setting the Table address the importance of community in business?

Community Engagement: Meyer emphasizes the need for businesses to engage with their communities, suggesting that successful restaurants contribute to the vitality of their neighborhoods. This engagement fosters loyalty and support from local patrons.
Shared Ownership: He discusses the concept of "shared ownership," where guests feel a sense of belonging and connection to the restaurant. This feeling encourages repeat visits and positive word-of-mouth.
Long-term Relationships: By building strong relationships with the community, businesses can create a loyal customer base that supports them through challenges. Meyer believes that investing in the community ultimately benefits the business.

How does Danny Meyer handle mistakes in his restaurants?

Awareness and Acknowledgment: Meyer stresses the importance of being aware of mistakes and acknowledging them promptly. This proactive approach helps to address issues before they escalate.
Apology and Action: He advocates for sincere apologies and taking immediate action to rectify the situation. This includes offering compensatory gestures to guests affected by the mistake.
Learning from Mistakes: Meyer views mistakes as valuable learning opportunities for both staff and management. He encourages a culture where mistakes are discussed openly, allowing for growth and improvement.

What is the "constant, gentle pressure" management style described in Setting the Table?

Balancing Accountability and Support: This management style involves holding employees accountable for their performance while also providing them with the support they need to succeed. It creates a positive work environment that encourages growth.
Setting Clear Standards: Meyer emphasizes the importance of clearly communicating expectations and standards to staff. This clarity helps employees understand what is required of them and fosters a sense of ownership.
Encouraging Teamwork: The approach promotes collaboration among team members, encouraging them to support one another in achieving common goals. This teamwork enhances overall performance and morale.

What role do suppliers play in the philosophy of Setting the Table?

Building Relationships: Meyer emphasizes the importance of developing strong, respectful relationships with suppliers. This mutual respect fosters loyalty and ensures a reliable supply chain.
Shared Values: He seeks suppliers who align with the company’s values and commitment to quality. This alignment enhances the overall integrity of the business.
Win-Win Transactions: The goal is to create mutually beneficial arrangements that support both the restaurant and its suppliers. This approach leads to better products and services for guests.

How does Danny Meyer define success in Setting the Table?

Beyond Profitability: Meyer believes that true success goes beyond financial metrics; it encompasses the quality of relationships with employees, guests, and the community. A successful business is one that nurtures these connections.
Creating a Positive Impact: Success is also measured by the positive impact a business has on its community and stakeholders. This includes contributing to social causes and fostering a culture of care.
Sustainable Growth: Meyer advocates for sustainable growth that prioritizes quality and hospitality over rapid expansion. This long-term perspective ensures that the business remains true to its core values.